Grab Your Goals!

Success can not be attained overnight. But, still, it can be attained. Funny how people can be so impatient most of the times. Just observe students in the middle of their school life. Instead of being excited that they’ll soon finish education, they would complain of getting bored and wanting to stop schooling for work or, worse, play. Employees and office people, by the time they think they have earned enough money for their family, would plan leaving work to just stay in the house. With these kinds of thinking and attitude, how would one expect to reach his goals in life?

Life is too precious to waste living it without a plan or goal. It is too short not living it to the fullest, as they say. Okay, okay. Say, you have a goal, a dream, a wish you want to fulfill. You’d ask, is that enough? The answer would be yes, as long as you have the assertiveness to reach it. Hey, it wouldn’t be called a goal unless you have no plans of achieving it, right? Otherwise, having a goal without the will to make it into reality is not enough.

Another problem regarding this matter is that people do have a goal but just don’t have what it takes to achieve it, or so they thought. Again, they become blinded by the negativity of their minds.

Money, socio-economic status, race, age, gender – these are just a few factors that hinder individuals to think that they have what it takes to attain success that everyone has been dreaming of. So what if you don’t earn a lot of money? Will that be reason enough for you not to attend school or find a job? How about if you are not among the authorities in your society? Or you’re of a different race? Or you’re still young? Or you’re a female? Should they even be considered reasons to discourage you in turning your dreams into reality? I don’t think so. It is only your mind that says so. Hence, fight it.

What you can do is put your mind into something you want to happen. Say, you want to be a writer. Therefore, think as a writer, feel as a writer, and be a writer. Practice. Read a lot. Grab all opportunities that would make you a writer. Like everything else that we wish to happen, in reaching for a goal, we should make sacrifices – time, effort, responsibilities, etc. After all, success does not come overnight. But eventually, it will.

And before anything else, believe that “I can reach my goals in life. Therefore, I will.”

How to build TRUST in a relationship

Trust is the one resource your relationship must have. If you don't have much trust in your partner, you won't be able to last for long. You see, trust builds credibility. When emergencies come or when there is a need to decide on something big, your trust in each other will get you through most problems.

Trusting means having faith regardless of how difficult it is to understand your partner. So, what happens if this trust is broken? For starters, you won't have much faith in your partner and will doubt everything he or she does. In your mind, you see another person; not the man or woman you chose to believe in.

Below I share with you 7 proven ways to build trust in a relationship. These have worked for me and i have no doubt in mind that they will work for you too.

1. Consider the obvious: You are human!

You make mistakes that you regret later on, and so does your partner. When you agree that you're both capable of making mistakes, you are one step closer to rebuilding trust. If you have the propensity to put your partner on a pedestal, you're setting yourself up for a complete loss of trust when your partner messes up.

The fact is, people will always do stupid things and you cannot control it. You only have control over the way you react to things. Don't sabotage your relationship by thinking your partner is infallible.

2. Say what you mean!

You can't say you are ok when you are frowning. At the same time, you can't tell your partner that you're in love with her or him when your actions say you don't. Not saying what you mean is a form of lying, and dishonesty in whatever form is bad for a relationship. Because your objective is to build trust back in the union, you must agree to say only what you mean and not hide anything from each other.

3. Believe in your partners capacity for change.

If you automatically think a tiger wont change his stripes whenever your partner tries to change, you're making the task of building trust a lot harder.

4. Never Keep Secrets.

Out of all the ways to build trust in a relationship, this is the most important. Secrets are seeds of dishonesty that will grow in time to choke your budding trust. Openness and expression are two things you must value above everything else. If you are both open and expressive, you may never have to keep secrets. To encourage openness, you can always start your sentences with "I feel..." or "I want to..."

5. Your needs are important

If you have been acting the martyr for a time now, you might have set aside your needs to accommodate your partners. Now is the time to let it all out. Tell your partner what you need and create a plan on how to meet those needs. Remember, you're both in this together. You're a team, and team members help each other.

6. Don't say yes when you mean no

There are times when your partner will insist on something, which in your opinion, is completely wrong. The key to disagreeing with your partner is to make it clear that your disagreement is not personal. You don't want to hurt him but you don't think his proposal is reasonable. Say this calmly and in a neutral voice.

7. Lastly, everything you do must contribute to your development as a couple.

Keep moving forward. Leave the bad memories behind and choose forgiveness. You will trust each other again in time if you can keep from digging up each others mistakes. Most importantly take action and apply these ways to build trust in a relationship.